Submitted: 6 August 1998


First Halfling Killed By Tart!

by Qualinius Al'Kai'Distai

(Riverhaven, Therengia: circa 348)

First, I must let you know a bit of the history of this story. Shortly before this incident took place, Kssarh had released to my guild the wonderous spell of Telekinetic Throw. We were still trying to master this new magic, and often the essences of the world caused it to do many odd things. Needless to say, I was one who possessed this spell.

Now, for the story:

The temple courtyard was lit brightly by the afternoon sun. A number of us sat on the lawn eating a late lunch. Included in that number was Mokikikako. Discussions that day were light and humourous, but slowly a chat between myself and Moki turned toward the competative nature he and I both shared. He stood up, drew his knife, and motioned toward the tart that lay upon the blanket nearby.

I raised my eyebrow and smirked. He began to advance on me, and I warned him that I'd throw that tart at him if he didn't stop. He laughed at the seemingly silly threat. Who ever heard of a tart hurting a hobbit? Heh.

He continued to advance, and I cast my spell. Unfortunately, the spell was still a little uncontrollable, and the tart blasted through the poor hobbit's stomach, spreading him all over our nice picnic.

The authorities immediately grabbed me, took all my gear, and threw me in prison. Fortunately, Moki was in good humor, and he bailed me out. And thus concludes my quick, first-hand rendition of the first (and only, to my knowledge) hobbit to have been killed by a tart.